Sunday, January 9, 2011

You have no idea.

I didn't sign up to play matchmaker.
But in a way, I guess I did.
Though it was not intentional.

Here's what you should know:
sometimes I say things,
not because that's how I feel,
but because I'm trying to fool myself
into believing what I'm saying.

I lie. To you. To Everyone.
But mostly to myself.

I'm just pretending,
but I guess that means I care.

I'm really trying to not feel this way.
You have no idea.

He could be yours, too.

What am I saying? It's not like you were ever mine. I never had you. I just held on too long. Firm grip.

You could love her,
I might mind,
but I'll tell myself it's great.

I'll tell myself it's meant to be.

I've done that in the past,
why should now be any different?