Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Summer Reading List // 2013

I've never made a summer reading list before, but I feel like it will help me stay motivated. I made a goal to read 40 books this year and I'm ahead of schedule right now (13 completed, though a few weren't actually books, but short stories or dramas...) and don't want to fall behind.

By the way, have you guys heard of a website called GoodReads? I discovered it this year and am in love.

List for the rest of Spring:

  • finish One Day by David Nicholls 
    • 80% through already! Hopefully I can finish this during Easter Break.
  • The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath. 
    • Okay, I'm on page 87...but only 11% through. This one might take a bit of time, and I don't expect to be finished with it by the end of spring.
  • I Am Legend by Richard Matheson
  • Life of Pi by Yann Martel

Summer 2013 List:
  • Slumber by Samantha Young
  • Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J. K. Rowling
  • Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson
  • The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett
  • Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe by Fannie Flagg
  • The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
  • To the Lighthouse by Virginia Woolf
  • The Blind Assassin by Margaret Atwood
  • Charlotte's Web by E. B. White
  • Emma by Jane Austen
  • The Pearl by John Steinbeck
  • The Fault in Our Stars by John Green
  • The Time Keeper by Mitch Albom
    • I still need to buy this one.
  • Bambi, a Life in the Woods by Felix Salten
  • Vanishing Acts by Jodi Picoult
Saving until Fall 2013:
  • The Lord of the Rings trilogy by J. R. R. Tolkien
Saving until Winter 2013:
  • The Call of the Wild by Jack London
  • White Fang by Jack London
  • Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
  • The Chronicles of Narnia by C. S. Lewis

A [slightly abridged] list of past dreams.

This is a short list of some of my dreams. Not all of the details are 100% correct, as many of them are from years ago. But they are either the ones that I remember the most or that I've written about somewhere. I may or may not add to this as I remember more.

  • I was shopping in Walmart, the CD section. Then out of no where, a Sasquatch turned the corner and walked straight towards me. It wasn't the tall gorilla-type that you normally picture; it was a bit lanky, hunched over, with a small, round face and long streams of fur covering it's entire body. It terrified me so much that I woke up in the middle of the night and had trouble getting back to sleep.
  • You and I shared an apartment. We were not dating, nor were any shenanigans going on. In fact, I told myself it was only temporary until I found another roommate. I had a dog that wasn't potty-trained. And instead of moving into our bedrooms, we both slept on separate couches in the living room.
  • You were alive, but I didn't know how. I was walking in a hall around a courtyard, like something you'd see in Harry Potter. And there you were, but I didn't know how. You smiled at me, and I began to hyperventilate. Don't you know--don't you know that you no longer exist?
  • We were about to go our separate ways; you one direction, I another. We were standing somewhere like a train station and the clock was ticking, but somehow fate had led us into crossing paths before we both continued on with our lives. And we looked at each other, didn't say much, and understood.
  • I was naked in a field, staring at a UFO.
  • There was a library where your house should have been. It was two stories and the ceiling was painted like the Sistine Chapel. And he was alive. He was alive, like a second chance--and I knew I had to do something this time. I would not sit back; I would not be a bystander again. On the top floor  of the library, I tried to find him, to warn him, to stop him, but there were so many people pressed against me that I could hardly breathe. I lost sight of him. By the time I got to the stairs, I knew it was too late. I saw a rope tied around the bars. I rushed down the stairs as fast as I could, feet practically not touching the ground, but I was too late. His body was swinging in front of me.
  • She had been kidnapped and taken to a city in the clouds. I found her there, at the highest point in a tree house. There were two trees very close together and each hand was tied to one, putting her in a position that made her look like she was flying. She was facing down a spiral of twigs below her that formed the face of God with outstretched arms, as though he would catch her should she fall. Below the twigs was a nest of baby owls. Mental torture, you see?--if she were to fall, the model of God would not be able to catch her and she would instead fall through and kill the baby owls, her favorite animal.
  • A baby fell down the stairs and died. The sound of the body hitting the floor made my stomach fall.
  • I fell through a wall and landed in a room with a bunch of people and two dogs staring at me. Each of them were dead--they had pale, almost translucent skin that was was thin over their skeletons. The veins on their arms bulged. The children there liked me--at night, they would cuddle next to me on the floor and I would comfort them. They saw me as hope, and I knew that only I could free them from their prison. I would do anything to help them.
  • It was our marching band's annual ice cream social. You were there, and I invited you to come to church with me sometime. You agreed, smiled, and went on your way.
  • I was sitting in a church. The congregation was large and friendly. You walked in late with your girlfriend, exchanging a funny, loving facial expression with the pastor. I think somewhere inside me, I still knew, but it didn't matter. You were there. You were happy. After you sat down, another walked in, also late.
  • I had died. All of us were in a field, unable to move until they came to you for your signature. They told you to go a certain direction, where you had to fill out a lot of information and take a test that would determine whether or not you got to go to heaven. I wasn't prepared and didn't have the right paperwork with me. I saw papers behind the desk--blue meant you got heaven; green meant not. Some of my closest friends had gotten green. I began taking the test. The first 39 were multiple choice; number 40 was an essay about the different grasses in Missouri. The guy behind the counter assured me knowing this was essential to get into heaven. "You're wrong," I said. "It's by faith."
  • It was in the middle of the night and I came upon a house full of vampires, though I didn't immediately recognize them for what they were. Something happened--I may have gotten bitten on the hand, or scratched. It wasn't conventional, and I remember not knowing whether or not I would become one of them.
  • You and I were friends again.
  • It was the future; I was not myself, but a woman who worked as a prostitute on a spaceship school for the mentally handicapped. There were several different species of humanoids on board, and several had dinosaur-like pets that I had never seen before. One day, people began to die. They thought the pets were responsible and started to exterminate them, but the deaths continued. My persona began to investigate only to find that she was the culprit. She never thought she was on the ship because she, too, had a mental handicap, but she actually had a split-personality.
  • It was post-apocalyptic. Zombies had taken over. I was not myself, but a young woman who had resorted to living among the wilderness. She fought with a spear. Her boyfriend had been missing for several days. One day, she found a zombie in the woods, but did not kill it because it resembled her boyfriend. At closer inspection, she realized it was not him, but still could not kill it because they looked so similar. He lead her to a house where there were a few survivors, but soon the zombies invaded and the lock on their door was broken and all of them knew it would not last long. The girl threw grenades, but it does little as the zombies continue to come at them.

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

On Equal Marriage.

Here's where I stand.

I'm a Christian.
I also support equal marriage.

I believe that marriage was invented by God and that he envisioned it to be a man and a woman.
but I don't believe it is right to take away someone's rights just because their beliefs are different from your own. Everyone should be given the same opportunities; everyone should be treated equally. Has the country learned nothing from the Civil Rights Movement?

Besides, if you're a Christian, is your goal really to keep the world free from homosexuality, or is it to witness to lost souls? How are you showing God's love to someone if you take away their free will?

I don't agree with homosexuality. I also don't agree with drinking and premarital sex, but somehow one is much more prevalent in today's society. My point is that you cannot force anyone to live the way that you want them to. You can only love them, teach them, guide them, and live as an example for them.

My wish is to keep this post short and to-the-point, so I'm going to end it there.
I love you all and want you to know that it's fine if you disagree with me and it's fine if you want to discuss it with me further in private, but I am not interested in arguing.


Wednesday, March 20, 2013


Follow my blog with Bloglovin

I'm just making a slight transition in light of the whole Google Reader thing. My blog will still be here, don't worry. Bloglovin is just an a different reader to use.


Those days when I hardly exist.

Sometimes, I'd like to silence my heart.
It seems that this organ inside of me
works too hard; pumps too loud;
resonates like a beating bass drum
from underneath my skeleton.

Sometimes, it is the only sound I hear
in the room. It is the only reminder
that I'm alive. I'm alive.


Tuesday, March 19, 2013

in and out.

You liked this song,
I remember.
You liked the way
the music faded
in and out.
in and out.

Much like our friendship
has faded since then:
in and out.
in and out.


not much to say.

Where have I been this month?
It's a good question.
I scarcely know.

I think the majority of my time
was spent watching Avatar: The Last Airbender.
I really enjoyed it.
Now it's over.
Now I'm back to normal.

I watched the premiere of Bates Hotel last night.
It was a bit sketchy.
I'm not sure about it yet,
though Freddie Highmore did a good job.

Deac said I've been too much of a fangirl lately.
I agree. It's time to hit the books again
and silently root along with the characters.

A boring post, I know.
I'm sorry.
I've been dying to write a poem.
Anything, really.
But I can't find the words.

I've just been walking along
in a daze this month.


Saturday, March 16, 2013


is on my mind.
I cannot say,
but it's you,
and you, and you.
The metamorphic
returned last night;
it threw curses 
upon my head.
Questions swarmed
and touched my fingers,
but erased every time.
To pry, or not to pry.
I'd rather let
everything stay dormant,
hidden--a sleeping dragon--
than to tickle the beast.
Though the worm
inside my brain 
continues to eat it through;
mulling it over, licking its flavor,
chewing and chewing
and chomping it down.


Friday, March 15, 2013

A Clarification.


I need to clarify.

In my last post, when I referred to the subject of my photos as "a boy down the street," I did not mean the boy down the street. In other words, I was not talking about Deacon. Deacon is the boy down the street and a senior and I did happen to take a few pictures of him that day, but the boy I actually was talking about is a different person, who would be better referred to as the boy down the alley.

It's confusing because I live in a small town and everyone is so close to everyone else. Bah!


On an unrelated note, I think somehow my school intentionally plans visit days on days with nice weather. And the food in the cafeteria is always better. It's a conspiracy. A facade. It lures the poor potential students in with lies. Lies, I tell you!

Well, my weekend has officially begun and hopefully I can finish the rest of these photos by next week. 


Wednesday, March 13, 2013

A list of things going on in my head right now.

a very stream-of-consciousness list.
  • I haven't posted in at least two weeks. Yeah, sorry about that.
  • My iTunes is not playing correctly.
  • I have no excuse as to why I have not posted in so long, seeing as last week I was on Spring Break.
  • We could just say I haven't posted because I was on Spring Break.
  • But all I really did was watch Avatar: The Last Airbender and work on homework.
  • All our snow days happened during mid-term week, so I had a lot to work on.
  • I filled out a study guide for my American Lit II class and it ended up being seven pages long.
  • Don't ever take an American Lit class. 
  • Rephrase: don't ever take an American Lit class if you like to have free time.
  • I actually broke out my camera during the break and took some senior pictures of a boy down the street.
  • I'll post some as soon as I get around to editing them. I've only done like, 10. Out of 200.
  • Yikes, I know.
  • BUT I told myself I would not start Book 3 of ATLA until I finished editing them. 
  • Seriously, I think I'm going through Post-ATLA Depression.
  • Okay, maybe not-so-seriously. But I do really want to watch it and see if Zuko and Katara ever get together.
  • I know they won't, but I really really really really really really want it to happen.
  • Apparently they're my OTP.
  • That's a real term. Stands for one true pair.
  • Although they might not be my OTP because I'm fine with her ending up with Aang. 
  • Plus, Kataang is so much more fun that Zutara.
  • Spring is my least-favorite season.
  • My sister gave me all this Indie music and I'm kinda addicted to Of Monsters and Men.
  • Seriously, how come nobody has mentioned them before? I have about 634,893,230 friends that like music like this. I'm disappointed in you. 
  • Yes, you.
  • That number was a rough estimate.
  • I'm debating whether or not I should read Oedipus Rex for my class tomorrow since I read it last semester for another class. 
  • Or I could just try and get through my next reading for American Lit II.
  • Gags.
  • Jenna came to visit me on Monday and brought the best cookies in the world and made me watch the Lizzie Bennett Diaries on YouTube.
  • Now I'm on episode 81.
  • It's a modernized version of Pride and Prejudice in vlog form.
  • I also shouldn't watch anymore of that while there are still 190 unedited pictures sitting on my computer right now.
  • Less difficult than the whole ATLA situation. But let's not get back there.
  • Question: why are there so many more Girl Scout cookies in the Thin Mints box than the Tagalong box?
  • I know they're called peanut butter patties now. But frankly, everyone knows their true identity.
  • And I used to be a Girl Scout, so I possess the right to call them whatever I like.
  • Yeah, it's true.
  • I might just read the synopsis of Oedipus Rex. Problem solved. To Sparknotes!